Whether you have 1 kid or 10 kids, I think it is built into us as parents to feel like we aren’t having enough quality intentional time with our kids. Life is so busy and crazy and I swear the minutes just go by so dang fast!! While I am no way perfect at this, I have really tried to make getting in that intentional time with each of my kids more of a priority lately, so I thought I would share some of my thoughts + tips that might help!
: INTENTIONAL = QUALITY OVER QUANTITY
Isn’t this the truth with just about any relationship? It is all about the quality time over the quantity of time. Houston and Harper still get a bigger QUANTITY of time with me because they are’t in school full time. But it is still on me to make sure I get some good QUALITY time in there too. Setting distractions aside to play a game with them or do a craft means the world to them. For Hayden, it might mean taking 10 extra minutes at bed time to scratch her back while she tells me about her day. In terms of quantity, 10 minutes seems like nothing but to her it means the world and the quality of the time is there.
: TAKE IT ANY TIME YOU CAN GET IT
While planning can help make sure you get that intentional time in, it isn’t always the easiest way to get it in. Be willing to make some sacrifices on your end too. Here is an example for you. My big kids are SOOO busy right now, that finding the time can feel impossible. I”m sure you teen parents can relate. We have found that finding a show the two of them and Joe + I can watch together is a game changer. While it may not be sitting and talking, we all really look forward to that more “grown up” time together watching the show. There are no distractions of friends or phones. Just us. Does it mean I get less sleep in every night and have to put other things aside? 100%! But it has been so worth it to have that uninterrupted time with them!
: INTENTIONAL DOESN’T HAVE TO BE BIG
This kind of goes along with my other points. While the big planned out dates can be so fun, don’t worry about it being something huge every single time. Some of my favorite special times with my kids have been the unscheduled ice cream runs on the way home from gymnastics, or a late night game of cards just for fun. They are the simplest things, but your kids (and you!) will love them and remember them.
Be realistic and give yourself grace!! Setting strict goals of an exact minute amount for every kid every day is not realistic. And on top of that, it turns the time into a chore instead of something you look forward to too. Remember, this is supposed to be fun!!
: YOU ARE DOING BETTER THAN YOU THINK
Most important out of anything I can tell you, is you are are doing better than you think you are. Just the fact that you are stressed you aren’t doing enough, means you are a great parent! I promise your kids see both the effort and the success!
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I hope these little tips are helpful in spending more intentional time with your people! I would LOVE to hear your favorite ways to get that in or any tips you have too!